Forgiving others

For those who hold grudges and consciously choose not to forgive. There are five things that you cannot recover in life:

(1) The Stone...after it's thrown (2) The Word...after it's said, (3) The Occasion...after it's missed (4) The Time...after it's gone, and (5) A person...after they die


This was a post on a Facebook status today and gave me reason to reflect.  I have been on both sides of this coin the person who has held a grudge and the person who has never been forgiven.  I am sure that most people have been in the same predicament from time to time.  The thing to this problem is this in order to forgive a person do we have to forget the things that they have done?  And if we choose to do so what happens if this person continues to do the same thing over again?


I think it depends on the situation and the person.  It also depends on if you have had enough.  I think you can forgive a person but not enable that person to do the things that they have previously done to you.  And let's be honest if you truly forgive a person in your heart then you are no longer caring the burden of the anger, hate or emotions that goes along with being mad at a person. That doesn't mean that you have to allow that person to continue to do the things that they do to you.


According to the Mayo clinic in the article Forgiveness: Letting go of grudges and bitterness at http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/forgiveness/MH00131 


"Forgiveness doesn't mean that you deny the other person's responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn't minimize or justify the wrong. You can forgive the person without excusing the act. Forgiveness brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life."


I learned this a few years ago - well at least 5 to 7 years ago.  I had been holding onto this bitterness and wanting to be forgiven and part of the family that I was once was.  I was able to walk past this when I started back to church and getting to know God.  He helped me realize that although I am mourning what was gone, lost and was a great part of my life.  There was nothing that I could do to change the fact that it was gone.  The only thing I could do is come to terms with it and forgive others and pray.  It helped me out a lot and it was as if the whole burden was lifted from my heart and life got much easier from that point on.  Now I am not going to sit there and tell you that it doesn't hurt from time to time but as time passes the hurt gets less and less.


Anyways, forgive others it does a body good.